John woke up the next morning with an odd rush of anxiety. Something was going to happen today, he was sure of it. He was going to see Kim today, and that was something he wanted to be sharp for, but there was also something else. He felt an odd mix of pending doom mixed with a kind of hope. Some significant change was on the horizon.
Driving out to Kim’s residence, John tried to put this feeling out of his mind. He wanted to give her the best of himself and be totally in the moment with her, and anxiety made that all but impossible. He felt like he had made some important internal strides lately, and he was dying to see Stephanie and talk about a number of things with her. He felt like he missed her very badly although he barely knew her. Even still, his feelings for her were strong.
As he pulled up to the driveway, he saw that Kim was waiting for him on the porch. It was a good sign he thought, and he even picked up on the faintest hint of a smile on her face. He was glad to see her.
“Hey kiddo, good to see you, what’s knew?”
“Oh, a few things, I guess. I’ve been wanting to talk to you. Do you mind if we walk again?” She asked excitedly.
John picked up on some good energy from Kim, and was encouraged while also a little cautious. He thought of a quote by Mitch Album, that “All parents damage their children. It cannot be helped. Youth, like pristine glass, absorbs the prints of its handlers. Some parents smudge, others crack, a few shatter childhoods completely into jagged little pieces, beyond repair.” He knew that Kim has been badly damaged, but it was his hope that she wasn’t totally shattered. He would do everything in his power to make sure that didn’t happen, but knew it would take a lot of work.
“So you seem happy today Kim and it’s sure nice to see you smile, what’s going on with you?” he asked curiously.
“Well the thing is, I met this boy. He’s 14 and he’s really cute. I’ve really liked my new school and Mrs. Corcoran has been great. I feel like I’m getting to start over. No one knows about me there and I don’t get teased.”
“Wow, well Kim I’m very proud of how well you’re doing. I know Mrs. Corcoran and, yes, she is very nice,” John said as neutrally as he could muster.
“She knows you too,” Kim chuckled back. “Maybe I’m not the only one here with a little crush.”
John laughed out loud at that as they continued to walk. Damn kids were perceptive sometimes. He felt 13 for this second but resisted the urge to pump Kim for information about her teacher. Still, he was dying to know.
“Kim tell me about this boy. How did you meet him?” John said, sounding like a concerned father.
“He’s in my class. He doesn’t know about my situation though, and I don’t want to ever tell him,” she said sharply.
“Yea, I could see why you’d feel like that. I just hope he’s nice to you. You deserve someone to be nice to you. I hope we can talk a little more about what it’s like to have such a big secret to keep. One thing I want you to remember though, is that you didn’t do anything wrong. You’re a good kid who survived a very hard situation. Keep that in mind Ok?”
With that Kim began to gently cry. Although John didn’t intend to cause her any pain with his comments, he also knew that she needed to work though this. People are quick to try and convince someone who is crying to stop, but he knew this was often a mistake. Legitimate grieving was an absolutely integral part of healing, and he wanted Kim to begin the process.
“Sorry if this is hard to talk about,” he continued. “I want to just remind you that I will never talk about or tell anyone about what we talk about unless I think it’s gonna lead to you getting hurt. Then I have to say something. But you can trust me and I will listen. I promise.”
“I know John, I know,” she said with a smile.
He liked it when she called him John.
On the way home John was feeling happy. Although he knew it would be an exceptionally long road for Kim, she was showing signs of resilience and he was encouraged. She seemed to have both her kindness as well as her sense of humor intact, and John knew both of these things would be tremendous assets in helping her cope.
John messed around with the radio and tried to find something pleasant for the road. He settled on Don Henley’s, “in a New York minute,” and began singing along with the music. His mind drifted off to the beautiful Irish-looking woman that had invaded his mind for weeks now, and he continued to daydream about her before he heard a loud boom. Then everything faded to Black.