As I mentioned earlier, I have been involved in mentoring with Bradford Keeney. The way this works is that I started with a phone call, followed by a series of e-mail exchanges. I thought my readers might find it interesting if I posted some of Bradford’s replies. I decided not to include my e-mails as I want to protect client confidentiality. Here are a few of his replies:
Hi Robert,
Of course you feel discouraged trying to move THIS client onto any solid ground. She’s a professional context shifter. You are one of her knights. You have served her well by showing that even a mighty professional of professionals cannot keep her out of her fairy tale. Now the opportunity is available for utilizing her expertise with defeating anyone who tries to save her from the dark and distressing forces of the forest. When she said, “today’s date was trying to guide her” I think that meant you. You were her date for that day. How clever of you to find its other hidden message regarding 9 months to gestate. It is a “baby game,” where one date after another tries to please their queen, impregnate her with new life, but only to find themselves back into the never ending fairy tale that has no end or beginning or middle. When you pointed it out, or came close to it, by addressing her feelings of fatness as a kind of pregnancy, note how she became very practical and stepped outside of the story. Very interesting: these dates she has with knights. If you get too far inside the forest, she steps out.
Yes she seeks protection, but not the kind anyone other than her grandfather could provide. I wonder how her grandfather would advise you. I am seeing a fantasy of my own. She comes to the next session. When she calls, you refuse to talk unless she comes to the office. Do not explain why other than saying it has to do with her grandfather. When she comes, there are two chairs facing one another. One chair has a glass of scotch (or colored water) near it. You immediately say, “I have failed.” Explain how have been trying to imagine having a conversation with her grandfather but are not creative enough to see or hear him talking to you. After all these sessions and years, you now know that only her grandfather was capable of protecting her. You and all other knights have failed. Unless you can somehow get some clues from him, you will continue feeling defeated and discouraged about your ability to help her. She will check you out and see whether you are playing. You have to enter this reality. Even talk to the grandfather’s chair (don’t let her sit in it) instead of her. Ask if he could try communicating in a different way because you aren’t strong enough to hear him. I think you get the general idea.
No matter what direction she tries to go or what distraction she offers, you turn to grandfather and ask him what he would do. “I am helpless unless you tell me how to protect her.” When she denies that he protected her (if she does that), say to Grandfather, “I especially don’t know what to say when she turns the table on me like that. She has defeated me again. I don’t think she defeated you. You were the strongest of all the knights…”
Utilize how she defeats you and all knights. Make it a new dark KNIGHT of the soul. Enter new territory where you use defeat as your mighty sword and grandfather as a stronger fiction than any other fictional episode she can intersperse. Maybe you become closer to her grandfather than she is. I bet you wish you had a grandfather like that. Who doesn’t? Find out more details about him so you can try to make a better connection with your fantasy of him. Even try to dream him. Tell her you will do this. You need as much information about him so you can establish a close link to him through your dreams. Fasten your seatbelt and sharpen the sword of your imagination!
Hail to the mighty knight of the circular thinking round table,
Brad
I anyone finds this interesting, I can post some more.
It’s been awhile since this was posted, but I would very much like to hear more of what has transpired with Brad. I’m a therapist-in-training, and I am interested in working with him.